7/02/2012

Quick Strips: Blondes Tease, Brunettes Please Review

Quick Strips: Blondes Tease, Brunettes Please
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(More customer reviews)
Your first tip-off that this DVD will have issues is that there are a total of 14 women featured, but the DVD is only 60 minutes. Do the math.
That's only about 4 minutes per girl. Sorry...not enough. Hot Body could have done us a huge favor by breaking this up into a two-disk collection.
The second problem is the format. Most of the ladies just strip...fairly quickly, I might add...all they've got is 4 minutes, remember? And then, most of them just dance or move around in front of the camera. The camera work is sure and steady, but with most models, it only pans up and down the woman's body, and then from a distance. Only rarely does the camera zoom in for any close-ups.
The next problem is John Cross, the guru behind Hot Body. It may be unfair to judge him as person. I've never met the guy, but who the heck does he get to write his scripts?? A 10-year-old kid off the street? His voice-over intros to each model, although mercifully brief, are annoying. While introducing Lola, it's "Here's Lola, another nymph from the Netherlands...trying saying that fast 3 times!" Not funny. While talking about Zoe Britton, he refers to her breasts as the 'dynamic duo'. Introducing Oriental hottie Lisa Lin, he decides to give us some special advice, stating that to get her motor running, begin kissing the neck, and then "take the oral theme south, being sure to investigate and service every 'nookie and cranny'." Pleeeasee!! I guess there are some folks, probably with precious little intelligence, who'll find this sort of stuff funny, but it just comes off as trite and immature.
To be honest, and to give credit where credit's due, Cross and his cronies have put together a stunning collection of some of the most beautiful brunettes in the world. If you're a guy and reading this, then girls like Veronica Zemanova, Penny Flame (who had one of the best vignettes) Monica Rios, Nikki Nova and Zoe Britton need no introduction. And you do get to see full frontal nudity, just not enough and not very explicit. It's just a shame to see these lovely women get short-changed by a deficient production. The time spent with each lady is just too limited....this disk would have served better as a preview of brunette models available on other titles. The last Hot Body title I purchased was on VHS and was years ago. While watching this DVD, I was reminded, painfully so, why I had drifted away from HB to other, better strip-tease producers.

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