Splatter: Naked Blood Review

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(More customer reviews)Let's face it, you're not here for a story.
Yeah there is one, with a deep message about excess.
But you're here for the blood.
And when it rains, boy does it pour.
If you're freaked out by self-mutilation, give this one a pass.
I personally had to pause this movie a number of times to make it through.
It takes a while for the gore to get going,
(there is a story here after all)
But once it does, grab your umbrella.
Here's what it's about:
Eiji infects his mothers 3 patients (all women testing out a new contraceptive)
with the ultimate pain-killer,
A pain-killer that turns pain into mounting pleasure.
This in turn, has disasterous effects.
One pateint is obsessed with eating
Another patient is obsessed with beauty
And the last suffers from extreme insomnia.
(She hooks herself up to a cactus, in order to sleep. Why? I have no idea)
***GORE SPOILER***
In this flick you'll see:
- one woman eat herself alive (hands, eyes, nips, and bajingo)
- another pierce herself to death (and I mean pierce)
- & a guy crawl into a woman's open chest cavity.
Sound up your alley?MORAL OF THE STORY:
The pain of life cannot be masked by excessive pleasure.
It will consume you.

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Circus of Horrors/Theater of Death (1967) Review

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(More customer reviews)Here are two gems with two yummy and hot male foreigners! The first film, Circus Of Horrors with the lead male played by Anton Diefring. Diefring plays a totally psychotic and over sexed plastic surgeon that takes over a carnival and subjects his female circus stars to some time under the knife with him. (HA HA) Diefring is a creepy, sexy, cold, megalomaniac intent on making disfigured women beautiful and then having his way with them. A youngish Donald Pleasance (the psychiatrist in the Halloween movies) has a bit part in the film. For the date the movie was filmed in (1960) it is QUITE THE horror/sexploitation film. The second film has Mr. Horror Guru himself, Christopher Lee as a creepalicious, power hungry theatre (of death) director and owner. The special effects are well done and the set of the theatre and Lee's home with secret passageways and the like is top-notch. This is the weaker of the two films, however, but still an enjoyable pic...

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Black Magic Rites (1973) Review

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(More customer reviews)(AKA 'The Reincarnation Of Isabel' 1973)- Before we go any further, if you're going to watch this flick, please do so in Italian with subtitles, as the English dubbed version is unwatchable. Not that anything will elevate this perverse gem of a sexually-overheated occult oddity to the status of a 'good' film, but those of us who revel in such insanity will be able to enjoy properly, as director Renato Polselli ('Delerium') intended.
This one starts with a woman being burned alive at the stake for being a witch to the bass line and percussion of Santana's 'Soul Sacrifice' while some psychedelic credits roll over Mario Bava-esque colors shining on the faces of the attendant villagers, so we know what kind of a schlocky treat we're in store for from the get-go.
Five centuries later, we're witness to a black magic ceremony involving a naked woman chained to an altar while some dudes in red leotards and black capes invoke Satan to reincarnate the soul of Isabel (the burnt witch) who gets a chance to be reborn every night of the 25th moon. You see, Count Dracula was the lover of Isabel the witch, who petitioned the powers of Darkness to become the first vampire, and presides over the reincarnation rituals.
That's the extent of the ridiculous plot; the rest of the flick is all about naked women. Euro babes, to be exact, and we see them being tied up, burnt alive, fondled, scantily clad, buried alive, tortured, in cages, beaten with tree limbs, losing their virginity, getting felt up by vampires, sacrificed, groped by their doctors, pursued by priests and superstitious villagers, in lesbian trysts and all the hysteria and melodrama we've come to expect from these Italian psych-horror sleaze fests. REJOICE or RUN AWAY! (2 stars for the flick, 4 stars for the rest...).


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Terror Firmer (2000) Review

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(More customer reviews)I'm a fifteen-year-old Troma fan, and Lloyd Kaufman is a hero of mine. He was coming to Cleveland to show Terror Firmer at the Cinematheque and have a short discussion beforehand. I was extremely disappointed that the theatre said that under absolutely no circumstances will anyone under 18 will anyone be admitted into this movie. Disappointed, I wrote a letter to Lloyd and attatched a copy of an essay I wrote about how he was my hero. To my surprise, someone from Troma's offices called and arranged for me to meet Lloyd one-on-one at the Rock'N'Roll Hall of Fame. To make a long story short, Lloyd spent the afternoon with me, and he was by far THE nicest, kindest person I've ever met, and he encouraged me to persue my passion for film. He gave me one strong word of advice: Don't see Terror Firmer. Now that I own it on dvd (*hah*) I know exactally what me meant. I cannot believe that the same gentelman made this movie, and was the one cursing througout the documentary. The whole point of this story is: This movie has no stops. It's even sicker than the conversations that highschoolers have at lunch. I love it. And if you're interested in filmmaking, the commentary tracks and documentary are an absolute must, as they've given me more insight to the filmmaking process than any other dvd or book. It's a must-have.

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Honored at film festivals the world over and revered by tromites and tromettes worldwide, Terror Firmer is an unforgettable look into the set of one of Troma's movies of the future! Featuring director Lloyd Kaufman in the role of blind director Larry Benjamin, Terror Firmer tells the story of a low budget film crew trying to make The Toxic Avenger Part IV, only to find themselves stalked by a sexually confused killer!A satirical schock-comic tro-masterpiece, Terror Firmer stands as the tro-magnum opus of blood, breasts, gore, satirical laughs that will stick with you forever! And that's not even including the extra features!A second disc features the feature length making-of documentary, "Farts of Darkness," which is must-see viewing for anyone interested in making their own damn movie!With over two hours of extra features, Terror Firmer delivers the troma-riffic goods!

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The Amityville Horror Collection (The Amityville Horror/ The Amityville Horror II: The Possession/ The Amityville Horror III: The Demon/ Bonus Disc - Amityville Confidential) (1983) Review

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(More customer reviews)The Amityville Horror Collection is a nice little DVD box set. You get 3 movies: The Amityville Horror / Amityville II: The Possession / Amityville 3-D, and a Bonus Disc - Amityville Confidential. Now nothing can compare to the original Amityville Horror as the newer ones got a bit out of hand. Im here to focus more on the DVD collection rather than the movies. This Collection will truly be appreciated by fans of the Amityville movies. You get a lot of great stuff with this collection. First you get a choice of either a High Definition, 16x9 Widescreen version of the film or a regular Full screen version. You also get great 5.1 Dolby Digital sound that brings new life to these films along with a choice of a regular mono track. The movies also include subtitle options in English, Spanish, and French. The amazing clarity makes the movies look like they just came out yesterday. These are HUGE improvements when compared to the old VHS versions of these films. Some of the other extras on this collection are: Audio Commentary by Dr. Hans Holzer, Ph.D. in parapsychology, "For God's Sake, Get Out" documentary, Radio spots, and the Original theatrical trailers. You get to see the theatrical trailer for THE AMITYVILLE 2005 remake which (in the bonus disc) they say the new movie is more based on the book than the original movie, and with the technology now days they can do more things from the book that they cound not do in the original film. You even get a free movie ticket to see The Amityville Horror (2005) staring Ryan Reynolds. Last but not least you get an awesome BONUS DISC called The Amityville Confidential. On the Bonus disc you get 3 great features:
1. On Location: A short little behind the scenes making of The NEW Amityville Horror (2005 Remake) which is released in the U.S. Apil 15, 2005.
2. The History Channel documentary Amityville: Horror or Hoax?
3. The History Channel documentary Amityville: The Haunting
What can I say this is a great DVD Collection with some great stuff. I encourage anyone who appreciates these movies to get this great collection. This is well worth the money for all that you get!

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